Description

A Deadpool Inspired Oolong Tea

In true Wade Wilson fashion, being a man of few words, this Oolong tea is !#&^)* *&@#!)%$ Great Tea! Perhaps he should try taking his used DeadpOolong tea bags and put them on those giant purple bruises he keeps getting. On second thought, he’d probably use them for something else.

Oolong, also known as ‘wulong’, is not a black tea and it is not a green tea. Depending on how it is processed, it may appear to have more characteristics of a black tea. Unlike black tea which is fully oxidized, and green tea, which is hardly oxidized, Oolong is a partially oxidized tea that falls in the middle. Oolong teas are overseen by artisan farmers that handcraft the tea leaves during processing, which is a complicated and time consuming effort.

You can almost visualize Wade walking into his subterranean apartment with a jar of maple syrup. The kettle is warm, and he grabs his unicorn floatie infuser and fills it with DeadpOolong. Oh my, you can smell the cinnamon and maple heightened by the apple and cloves as it steeps. He takes his soup bowl full of tea and his carryout box and sighs. Whoops, there it is! He’s calling Uber Eats and ordering a big stack of gluten free pancakes from Denny’s. Now, pop in Deadpool 2 4K into the Blu-ray player, sit back, and enjoy a perfect evening.

Try steeping this maple oolong tea a second time and add an extra minute. Wade could never wait for the second cup, but trust me, you have time.